


Time Flies When You're In Love

by QueenOfDesithell (orphan_account)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Powers, Awkward Castiel, Bunker, Cooking, Cute, Dean Winchester - Freeform, First Kiss, Fluff, Grilled Cheese, Hand Touching, Hunter - Freeform, It's kind of a date, M/M, Movie Watching, SO MUCH FLUFF, Titanic - Freeform, Tooth Rotting Fluff, Witch - Freeform, angel - Freeform, castiel - Freeform, cheek kissing, dean is a childish cutie, long fic, love potion, maybe some smut, potion, power, reckless, sleeping, strong feelings, true to the show
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-10
Updated: 2015-02-03
Packaged: 2018-03-07 00:26:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3153986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/QueenOfDesithell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Angels weren't even supposed to feel, that was the most difficult thing. . Every scenario that was associated with feeling had been shut down, but, then again, Dean Winchester wasn't just any scenario.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cuteness and Witches

He'd gotten used to the empty feeling in his being when the man wasn't by his side. He'd gotten used the the heart-hammering, blood-rushing feeling when he was.  
The blush in his cheeks seemed permanently and embarrassingly there, as did the clammy hands. The shiver that ran down his spine whenever the man talked was forever attacking him when his gruff voice floated through the air, seeming to knock his body right down and steal him of all of his oxygen.  
In reality, he'd gotten used to all of it, but it was the eyes that still got him each and every time, when the man focused them on him. They were a bright green, not really one shade, but like all of the shades mixed together. They were forever full of mischief and determination, and every time they bore into him, he felt like he was melting where he stood. They were simply beautiful, as was their owner.  
See, Castiel had gotten accustomed to dealing with all of the attributes of a love that was meant to be hidden...and that was also one-sided.  
These feelings were like a vial of poison, and he kept bringing it to his lips and drinking. Don't even get him started on feelings though. They were new, and felt foreign in his angel mind, and they were so damn strong that he felt as if his every action was powered by them. It made him feel pathetic and vulnerable, as if he couldn't stand on his own two feet without his emotions to help him and drive him on.  
But Angels weren't even supposed to feel, that was the most difficult thing. . Every scenario that was associated with feeling had been shut down, but, then again, Dean Winchester wasn't just any scenario.  
Now all of this, all of the helpless feelings of being lost and unwanted, had driven Castiel to become reckless. It wasn't his fault really; everyone who'd ever laid eyes on Dean wanted his attention, no matter how little he had to spare. And the angel, well, he wanted way more than he got. He wanted it all from Dean, from his "best friend" as the humans called it. He wanted that bond, he wanted those feelings, he just wanted Dean. Nothing could get in the way of his determination for the man he'd become the closest to in his entire life.  
~  
So, here he is, feeling nervous (Jesus Christ, another feeling) as he stands stock still, facing his long-hoped-for answer. Agatha.  
He gazed upon her long figure as she stood with her hands placed sassily on her hips.  
"An ANGEL coming to a WITCH for help?" She giggled, hiding her mouth behind a prettily manicured hand. Castiel could feel the blush creeping up his neck, spreading to the tips of his ears and the apples of his cheeks.  
It was absurd, yes he knew that. But he also knew how powerful witches such as Agatha herself could be. He scowled.  
"All I'm asking for is one vial. One little mixture of all things magic that can help me- I mean, him. Just a test trial. Please. I just need-"  
"Jesus angel you talk a lot" Agatha interrupted him, seemingly annoyed at his desperateness. Yeah, well, so was he.  
"Please" he uttered, throwing her his best look. He made his eyes sad looking, as if he'd been neglected for all of his life (in truth, he kind of had) and he pouted his bottom lip just slightly enough for it to be noticeable.  
The puppy-dog look. He had learned it by watching Dean's younger brother Sam, and he had used it so much that he had very well perfected it. He really was irresistible. Every angel in the garrison knew it, and now so did the witch.  
She paused to look at him, sighed and rolled her eyes before strutting to an antique piece of cabinetry across the room. Her tall black heels clicked as she crossed the wood flooring, and the cabinet creaked when she opened it. His heart was pounding.  
She reached inside and pulled back quickly, clutching something in her hand as she withdrew it. The witch was in front of him in an instant once more, and she held out her enclosed fist. Eagerly, the angel thrust out his hand and let the small vial she'd been holding drop into it.  
"Just a test run. Only 24 hours angel, then it wears off. See if he really does love you." she commented, grinning goofily at him. Castiel ignored this and nodded, and was gone in a flash. A flutter of his tan trenchcoat was the only evidence that he'd gone.  
~


	2. Nothing Suspicious, Go to Sleep

Castiel propelled himself through the darkness of space, headed for the only place he wanted to be. The bunker.  
It had belonged to ancestors of the two Winchester brothers, very important ancestors called The Men Of Letters, who were very keen on their hatred of hunters like Sam and Dean themselves. But they were gone now, and the siblings were in their prime, so naturally, they'd dusted off the furniture and taken it over as their very first permanent home.  
Dean, appropriately, called it the "bat cave".  
He landed solidly on his feet, his eyes instantly adjusting to the dim light of the room he'd arrived in. By the thousands of books stacked neatly on the shelves, and pure smell of knowledge, Castiel knew it was the bunker's study.  
"Geez Cas give a guy some warning won't you?" A haughty voice comes from behind him. He didn't have to turn around to know who it belonged to, the shiver down his spine was a telltale sign already.   
"Hello Dean...My apologies for the sudden intrusion" he replied calmly, his voice strong as he spun around to face the hunter.   
Dean sat in one of the wooden chairs placed haphazardly around the table at the center of the study, his legs spread to the edges of the chair, his back resting comfortably slouched against the back of it. The angel swallowed thickly at the sight of him, his hands slightly curled into fists at his side.   
Dean rolled his eyes then, a small grin on his face as he exhaled sharply as if trying to laugh but not giving the effort. Never once did Castiel take his eyes away, not even when the man turned back to whatever book he was searching through.   
"Did you need something?" the hunter asked, his voice low and gruff, his eyes still trained on the book as he spoke. He took a few steps toward his human, his hands clammy and his brow creased.  
"No Dean" he replied, but all the while his mind was screaming 'you, I need you'.   
"Then while you're just standing there, would you mind getting me a beer?" Dean asked disinterestedly, finally turning away from the book to cast a glance at Cas. The eyes, god, they pierced right through the angel, and he'd be damned if he didn't nod his head.  
"Whatever you wish" he said calmly before turning on his heel and striding out of the room as quickly as possible without arising suspicion. As soon as he'd shut the door and made it safely into the hallway, he took a deep breath, leaning his back against the hard wood of the door.   
"Dammit Castiel" he whispered, chiding himself on his lack of social skills. He rolled his eyes at himself (something he'd learned from Dean) and pushed away from the door, making his way into the bunker's kitchen. At least now he had an excuse to slip the potion into Dean's drink without any suspicion or sneaking.   
The angel crossed the threshold into the very unimpressive, but still quite useful kitchen. It was small, and practically all gray, and you could hardly tell it was used.   
He grabs a beer from the fridge on his right (a small, rickety, white appliance) and pops the top off with a strong thumb while simultaneously closing the fridge door with his foot. He hasn't even need to look inside the fridge fully to know that it was mostly devoid of all food, but stocked full of beer. Dean's personality never failed to show...  
A quick look around the room shows that there was no one to tell him not to do what he was about to. He gulps down a quick breath and produces the vial from the inner pocket of his trenchcoat where he'd hidden it, popping its top off quite like he did the beer. The contents were quickly dumped into the foul alcohol, mixing straight in without a difference in color or smell. Perfect.   
Though he was an angel, he still had his bouts of laziness, and that led him to forget about simple walking, and transport himself back into the study. The flutter of his coat was the only indication that he'd reappeared, right behind Dean this time, which caused the hunter to give a startled jump.   
"I hate when you do that man" he grumbled under his breath. Castiel had to clench his eyes shut to keep from smiling. Normally, the angel would have all of his vessel's feelings turned off, kind of like a light switch. But with Dean, he always had them on. You see, the poor man WANTED to feel the emotions and actions that came with being in love. And damn, did he feel them strong.  
"Here" he finally said gruffly, reaching over Dean's shoulder to set the beer bottle on the table. His hand hovers there, so close to Dean's as it's resting on the side of his book, a page caught between two fingertips. The angel's front is almost pressed straight into the hunter's back, so close that Castiel can feel the warmth coming off of him.   
"Uh, Cas-"  
"Right, right" he quickly interrupts, backing away from Dean with angelic speed and propelling himself into the chair across from the other man's. He'd embarrassed himself enough already today.  
Dean raises his eyes from his book just enough to catch Castiel's gaze, the green completely melting Cas where he sat. Dammit, there goes the blush. He averts his eyes before he starts to mumble or stutter or stammer in front of Dean.   
The angel felt like a sweat was breaking on the back of his neck when Dean finally raised the bottle to his lips, closing his eyes as he took a long pull from it as if he hasn't had a drink for days. Castiel, entranced, watched his lips form around the opening of the bottle, and it was then that something in him stirred.   
Dean called it "the downstairs brain."   
He looks away, as if he'd been watching something he shouldn't, and shifts uncomfortably in his seat. He clears his throat, and Dean stops his tantalizing assault on the drink, raising an eyebrow suspiciously at the angel.  
"Something on your mind Cas?" He asks, to which the angel quickly shook his head.   
There goes the blush...again. Dammit, why couldn't he get a hold on himself?!  
Dean shrugged and quickly put the bottle back to his lips, finishing it in seconds like a pro. Poor thing, he really did drink too much to be able to empty a bottle within 3 minutes. At least the potion would be working quicker...  
Castiel stole a quick glance at a clock on the wall.   
10:30  
He nods to himself and turned back to the hunter, who looked as if he'd just looked away from the angel quickly, his eyes pointedly fixed on his book as if afraid to stray from it again.   
"What are you reading?" Cas inquired, resting his chin on one hand, his elbow propped on the table nonchalantly.   
"Lore on demons" the man replied distractedly. He sighed heavily then, and sat back in his chair, suddenly tearing himself away from the yellowed pages of the old book. His hands ran down his face tiredly, and he sighed again.   
"We gotta stop em man. They're killin too many people. And I'm afraid they're gonna get Sam again. Or you."  
Those emerald gems pierced right through the angel. He swallows thickly, feeling scrutinized as the man gazes upon him.  
"We'll stop them Dean, I'm sure of it. But aren't you tired right now? You've had a long day haven't you?" Castiel asks, motioning his head towards zig-zagged lines on the underside of Dean's exposed forearms. Castiel had secretly followed along the brothers on their werewolf hunt.  
"S'early yet Cas" Dean excuses, taking his eyes away from the blue eyed man to stare down at the cuts he'd received on the werewolf hunt earlier that day. As if Cas didn't know.   
"That's no excuse Dean," he replies, standing up from his chair and walking around the table to Dean, his dress shoes clicking on the wood flooring as he walked. He approached the hunter from behind his chair, his fingertips already glowing with a blue-white light that only an angel could bear. Slowly, he reach out his hand, placing two fingertips onto Dean's forehead. Dean reluctantly sighed and closed his eyes, letting his angel heal the wounds on his arms. Normally, the hunter didn't like this form of healing, usually opting for the more natural method. But he really was too tired to protest against it at the moment.  
When it was over, Castiel retreated a few feet, keeping his eye trained on Dean. The hunter glanced at him, and suddenly failed to keep his eyes from drooping, the power of sleep that Cas had charged into him with his touch suddenly coming into play. He snapped the gems them back open dazedly, glaring at the angel before the drooped again.  
"Go to bed Dean" Castiel slightly chuckled, knowing full well how annoyed Dean was with him for basically giving him sleeping medicine.   
The man pushed his chair away, wood screeching on wood as he staggered to his feet.   
"Screw you, angel" He muttered tiredly as he strode past Castiel, bumping their shoulders as he passed. The angel grinned to himself, pleased, and watched the hunter retreat to his bedroom.  
~


	3. Kisses and failure

Castiel had watched the hunter sleep through the night. Though a bit "stalkerish" as Dean liked to call it, (He himself preferred the word "protective"), the angel couldn't pull himself away from gazing upon the smooth contours of Dean. His face, and all of his freckles. The fluttering eyelids as he dreamed heavily. The soft breaths coming from between his lips. The way his body would contort to get comfortable, exposing skin and curves and glorious freckles everywhere. Castiel loved it.   
And every morning that Castiel had gone through at the bunker, he timed his departure from Dean's room just right to when he awoke, and would await him in the kitchen, holding a pot of freshly brewed coffee, black to Dean's liking.  
And that's what he was doing now, holding the pot in his hand, a mug in the other, watching as Dean stumbled in in his pair of flannel sweatpants and old ac/dc shirt, rubbing through his hair and blinking tiredly.  
"Coffee?" Cas asked, not even needing the reply, but wanting to hear that deep morning voice he secretly adored.  
"Hell yes" the hunter grumbled, and Castiel was already shoving the mug into his hands. His vessel's heart was pounding, and he finally let himself show some of his emotions. One hand lingered for only a moment before grasping Dean's hand that wasn't occupied by his mug. Startled, Dean shot a glance up at his best friend, then back down at his hand being enveloped in Cas's.  
'Come on Dean. Please. Just a reaction, a squeeze back. Something.' Cas pleaded to himself, but the man only pulled his hand away. It wasn't roughly or anything of the sort, but damn, the angel was hurt. Maybe Agatha had lied to him. Maybe the potion didn't work.  
He snapped his hand back as well and quickly backed away from Dean, disappearing from the room and propelling himself completely outside of the bunker.   
He leaned his head against the cold brick of the exterior of the bunker, his head pounding and his heart throbbing.   
"Dammit" he whispered heart-brokenly to himself. But he couldn't give up on Dean. He still had the whole day, and one failed plan couldn't deter him. And so he propelled himself back inside...after a few minutes of quiet despair.   
9:00 a.m.  
An hour later he'd finally mustered up the courage to face Dean again after his humiliating attempt at physical contact. The hunter was quietly rested at the kitchen table, a small stack of newspapers at his side. He seemed calm as he leafed through them, noting Cas's presence without even looking up. The air smelled of newsprint and Dean, and Castiel was plagued with the thought of the whereabouts of Sam. And so he tried again.  
"Where's Sam?" He questioned gruffly. His hands were in nervous fists at his sides as he stood in the doorway, watching Dean glance through the pages of the newspapers, probably searching for another job. The poor man was always working, working to keep his own monsters away. Castiel hated it.  
"Out. Said he had business to take care of. Whatever that means" Dean mumbles back grumpily.  
He nodded in reply and "casually" strolled over to place himself strategically behind Dean, pretending to look at the cupboards on the gray walls, but in reality, it was only an excuse to peek over Dean's shoulder.   
And he got close, really close. So close that it pushed the boundaries of too close. His eyes scanned the newspaper in Deans hands distractedly, meanwhile, his head was right beside Dean's whilst actually looking over his shoulder now. Their cheeks were almost touching, scruffed cheek to clean shaven cheek, so close that their heat radiated between them and mingled together. By now, Dean had already stopped fiddling with the papers, perplexed as to why his friend was suddenly so close. He seemed frozen as Cas was so near, though he didn't say anything. Not a protest, but not a praise either. he was just silent, and and breath seemed to be stuck in his throat.   
The angel hadn't dared turned his eyes to glance at Dean sideways, keeping them trained on the newspapers. They were still for a few seconds, and Castiel waited, but the hunter made no move like he'd hoped. Guess he had to muster his courage and try again.  
"This has potential" he quickly said, reaching his hand over Dean to point at a small headline in the paper.  
WOMAN FOUND: HEART MISSING  
And quickly, before he had any chance to back away without more contact, the angel planted a small kiss on the scruffed cheek of the hunter. If it was possible for him to have frozen more, Dean did, his whole body stiffening with the touch of Cas's chapped lips against his cheek. He wasn't responding well to any of it.  
Shit, he wasn't responding well to any of it.   
Castiel gulped quickly, feeling the painful burn on his cheeks and neck, and threw himself out of the room at the speed of light.   
Shit, shit, shit, shit. He'd been too fast, Dean didn't respond. He been too bold, and Dean froze. Shit.  
The poor angel felt like crying at his humiliation, at his utter failure to get the one man he loved most to love him back. Dean was supposed to show his love because of the potion, yet he still hasn't changed. Maybe he actually didn't love Castiel...God, Cas couldn't bear the thought of it. He locked himself away in a spare bedroom in the bunker, where no one would come looking for him. He had failed again.  
What he didn't know as he disappeared away from Dean, was that Dean was about to say something, anything. Maybe tell him to stay, or that it felt nice. But the angel was gone, and all he could do was unfreeze from his shock with a small smile and a tingly feeling where Cas's lips had been.   
~


	4. Castiel and The Cheese

12:00   
Three hours. It took him three hours to pull himself out of his embarrassed misery and out of the small bedroom cramped with dusty furniture.   
Dean wasn't around, but the angel needn't look for him- he could hear the shower running as he walked through the halls past the man's bedroom. He ignored the stir in himself at the thought of Dean alone, naked and wet in the shower, and continued on the to kitchen. Maybe a nice lunch would soften the ice that was forming between them with every humiliating attempt at affection...maybe it'd even break the ice totally.   
And so, he tried.   
Problems arose quickly, basically as soon as Castiel tried to do anything. There was hardly any food in the goddamn fridge. None at all in the cabinets, save the stale box of cereal the boys had forgotten about. And the only thing on the counters was a bag of bread.   
Figures.   
So, he decided to try to make that one thing, like a sandwich with bread and cheese, but it was warm, and you made it on a stove. He could remember what they were called...  
Another curve was thrown at him when the damn stove wouldn't even turn on. Well, it was mainly because he didn't know how it worked. So he cheated, and use his powers to light the gas... thing that would heat the other thing that would heat the pan.   
God, he was so confused.  
He put the pan on the stove, waiting a couple minutes until he thought I was hot enough before he threw a slice of bread into it. Had to heat up the bread before you put the cheese on it right?And so he waited some more.  
He thought he'd done it well enough, but when the trickling smell of something burning wafted into his nose, he knew he'd done it wrong. Of course.   
So he quickly took the pan handle and carried the pan to the sink, dumping out the damn burned bread as quickly as possible and returning the pan to the stove. So he'd waited to long. And how was the cheese supposed to get melted? Maybe if you...  
Quickly, he put his plan into action, frantic in his movements when he heard the shower tap shut off. He threw in a slice of bread, slapped a piece of cheese that he'd found from a stack in the fridge (he hoped it was still fresh) and threw another slice of bread on top of that. Perfect. At least it looked like a sandwich now.   
He hadn't known before now how loud sizzling bread could be. And shit, he heard footsteps.  
Castiel knew he couldn't wait as long as he did for the last one, so once the bread started looking "crispy", he quickly got a plate, grabbed the pan handle, and dumped the sandwich which he still couldn't remember the name of onto the plate.   
"Cas?" A voice calle from behind him. He whipped around quickly, plate in hand, and took in the irresistible sight of his hunter. He was in jeans, but hell, he was JUST in jeans, which even hung loosely on his hips. No clothing tainted the tan skin of his upper body. Small beads of water still clung to his muscled skin. Freckles scattered across his toned chest. His hair was still dripping, and those damn green eyes were boring into his soul.  
The angel swallowed thickly, frozen in his spot. He couldn't comprehend any thoughts, any actions. He could only focus on the sudden southward throbbing, and the firebrick red blush on his face. He seemed awash with heat.  
"What's that?" The hunter asked, seemingly unfazed. Meanwhile, Castiel was transfixed, and wondering how any one human could be so beautiful. His eyes followed the path of Dean's, straight into the plate.  
"I um I made it f-for you" he stumbled over his words. The hunter came closer, and Cas slowly reached his hands out, the plate shaking slightly as he extended it towards Dean.   
"A grilled cheese?" The hunter inquired, smiling slightly. Castiel didn't realize that they had been Dean's favorite as a kid. He hasn't had one in years, especially not made for him.  
"I burned the first try" the angel laughed softly, his eyes stuck on Dean's body. He felt shy, but at the same time, he would ravage the hunter, if given the chance.  
Dean averted his eyes to look at Castiel, and for the first time in a long time, he had a true smile on his face, one that came all the way into his eyes and crinkled his forehead.   
"Thanks man" he beamed, then shuffled away from the other man while simultaneously taking a bite of the sandwich.   
Castiel blushed pink out of shyness and the feel-good feeling of Dean's praise. He wanted more of it.  
There was soon enough, a bottle of Dean's favorite beer on the table beside him. The man smiled up at him, his mouth full of bread and cheese, and gave a thumbs up. The angel returned the grin, finally thinking he's got it in the bag and is going to make Dean show his true feelings and win his affection once and for all.   
"Do you want another?" He asked, hiding his giggles as he watched the man wolf down the simple sandwich. Dean nodded his approval, not even able to talk around the food in his mouth. Usually when humans did that, he found it repulsing, but when the man did it, it was actually kind of cute.  
He quickly returned to the stove to make another "grilled cheese". Meanwhile, he shed his beloved trenchcoat and suit coat underneath, the air in the room much too hot, leaving him in his crisp white dress shirt and tie. He began making the sandwich again, all the while wondering why exactly it was called a grilled cheese if you didn't grill the cheese...  
What he didn't know of was the green eyes staring into his back. Dean had turned around in his seat discreetly, taking pulls on his beer as his eyes were entranced with watching how the angel moved. He couldn't stop the thought of how good Cas looked without the usual attire.   
~


	5. The Pizzaman

6:30  
Dean had eaten the second sandwich and drank his beer quickly. He'd stayed for maybe 3 minutes after he was finished, but almost immediately got up and left the room.   
Of course, Cas had liked the pat on the shoulder when Dean voiced his thanks before he walked out, but that was it?!  
That was really all the hunter did. He hadn't changed, or showed Castiel extra attention. Nothing!   
He left the angel alone and gone to go find Sam, which took forever. He'd only just now gotten back. Castiel was starting to panic. There were four hours left.  
"Why were you gone for such a long time?" He inquired, almost angrily. Dean had wasted precious time that Castiel could've used to win him over.  
"I couldn't find him. I looked everywhere. All over town. All of the motels. And nothing. That took hours. And then the remaining time I used to track his cellphone, and yeah, it led me to him. He was two towns over, in a crappy motel, half naked with a woman in his bed. I was out of there in two seconds flat, yet I'm sure he heard me laughing. But yeah, now here I am." Dean explained.  
The angel wanted to roll his eyes. Sam was a big boy, and Dean had wasted his time looking for him. He wanted to scold the man for his foolishness.  
"What would you like to do now?" He asked instead, keeping the frustration from his voice.   
"I don't know man. I could go for some grub. A little relaxation time would be nice too. This demon stuff has me all whacked out" the hunter replied, running a tired hand down his face. He really looked worn out. The poor thing probably hasn't had a free night in weeks. Cas deflated his anger instantly.  
"We could get pizza. And watch one of those moving pictures you humans enjoy." Castiel pondered then, his eyes full of hope and his heart and mind consumed with the thought of cuddling next to Dean in the dark while watching the television.  
"Dinner and a movie Cas?" Dean chuckled, his voice warm, full of something that was hard to read. Happy nervousness maybe?   
The angel couldn't guess what was so funny about his plans. He wasn't in on whatever joke Dean had thought of. So he just nodded instead, eagerly awaiting the man's approval.   
Dean took one look at his angel's excited face, and instantly he was won over. His heart complied and he muttered a "sure that sounds good".   
Castiel had to keep himself from voicing his approval, and only smiled instead. What was going on here? He felt...giddy. Sure, he'd always been nervous around Dean, but never giddy.  
The hunter grinned back for only a second, as if the smile wasn't meant to come out, and then moved past Cas from the bunker into the kitchen. The angel followed like a puppy behind his owner, perfectly content with watching the way Dean's legs strutted out, and how his back contracted every time he'd turn.   
He finally stopped in front of a drawer in the kitchen, Castiel holding back behind him, and ruffled through it until he produced a large paperback book.  
"Pizza time" he grinned, flapping the book around as if it weighed nothing. The angel was confused as Dean set the book down and flipped through it, stopping on a page when he'd found what he'd wanted.  
Cas approached his side, looking over the man's broad shoulder at the tiny text in the book. It was filled with names and numbers and addresses.   
Dean pulled out his cellphone from his pocket, almost dropping it because of his distraction with watching the confused look on his best friend's face as he peered at the phone book. He recovered himself before the angel realized his mistake, and tapped his finger down on the yellow pages, right on the number for the pizza place. Castiel followed his movement, finally getting what Dean was doing.   
Meanwhile, Dean already had the phone to his ear, ready to place his order.  
"What kind of pizza do you like?" He asked the angel quietly as he listened to the mechanical drone of the automated mantra of the pizza place.   
"I don't eat, Dean" he replied, wanting to laugh at the man. Dean mouthed "oh" back to him before he turned his attention back to the phone.  
"Yeah Ill take a large pizza. Half meat-filled, half cheese. Yup. Dean Winchester. Yeah. Thanks." His sultry voice casually bantered with the cashier. Shivers were shooting down Cas's spine like electric shocks as Dean dropped the phone back into his jeans pocket.   
"Now what?" Castiel asked nervously. His body was hyperaware of the closeness of Dean, and his mind went back to this afternoon, seeing Dean without a shirt, water still rolling down his tanned and freckled skin...he blushed and swallowed thickly.   
"Now we wait" Dean replied lightly, casting a soft glance at his angel, catching the remaining glimpse of red cheeks.   
7:15   
30 minutes later, a soft knock of the large wooden door to the bunker indicated the arrival of their -Dean's- pizza. Castiel followed behind his human shyly, stopping short of the entryway stairs to let Dean grab the pizza. He himself was filled with embarrassment at what the pizza man might look like...or what he might do if he was let into the bunker.  
But his thoughts were erased as Dean bounded down the stairs, hot cardboard bow that carried the smell of cheese and grease balanced in his hands. Dean flashed a look at Cas that beckoned him to follow behind as the hunter strides past him, strong legs carrying him to the small living room adjacent to the study.   
The room was rarely used -even the study was less dusty than this- and as Dean plopped down onto the small couch placed perfectly against the center of the back wall, plumes of dust leapt from it.   
"Woah" Dean half chuckled, half coughed, a strained smile on his face as he saw Castiel still standing in the middle of room, watching him.   
"I can help" he sighed, though it was out of content for his human. With the snap of magic fingers, the room was light and free of dust, though the musty smell still lingered. Castiel quite liked it, it smelled like memories.  
"Thanks man" the hunter replied, a piece of warm pizza already dripping grease onto his hand. The angel watched his teeth close around the first bite, swallowing hard to get the image of those teeth out of his mind now, peak ill swarming with the other brain-frying, sense-numbing, sexy images from before. Why were these thoughts attacking him now?!  
Not wanting to disturb Dean, and trying to forget his disturbance himself, he sauntered over to the tidy bookshelf on the walk adjacent to the couch's wall. His stared, perplexed, at the dozens of movie cases lining its shelves, shining and begging to be watched. Cas wanted to watch them all with Dean. He ran his fingers over their spines, catching the slick of the plastic cases against his fingertips.   
Dean was watching this, watching the way the angel's fingers bumped over every case, imagining how they feel running over his skin. His mouthful of pizza was swallowed hard, and he mentally slapped himself for letting his mind be entranced. He'd become very good at hiding what he thought.


	6. A Date and A Dean

7:45  
Dean had finished four whole pieces of pizza, seemingly famished as if he'd never had a meal in his life. Cas had grown bored with running his hands over the movies after the second piece, and had taken instead to reading the titles to calm his nerves - there were less than three hours left- because Dean still hasn't given him what he craved...his affection.  
This movie was his last chance.   
"So what are we watchin'?" The hunter's voice shocked him out of his panic. He'd been oblivious to Dean's presence very close behind his back, but now it was instantly all his body was focused on. His mind was incessantly telling him that he had to try something else to try to win Dean over and force his true feelings out into the open.  
So, slowly, he turned, letting his eyes fall to the ground until he stood face to face with Dean, to where he let the blue orbs slowly trail up the man's body and rest finally on his own green eyes.   
He hasn't even done anything yet, and Dean seemed slightly frozen where he stood under the scrutiny of the Angela's powerful gaze.  
Everyone knew of Dean's love for intercourse, and he'd always been jealous of the meaningless girls the hunter slept around with. But forgetting that, he also knew a little about how arousal worked -Dean was always the cause of his.  
And so, still slowly, the angel leaned in. Dean move back slightly, prepared to turn away from his advances, but Cas was quicker.  
"Something lovey will do. I like romance stories" he softly whispered into Dean ear, making sure that the man could feel his hot breath. He wanted the hunter to feel it, wanted him to take hold and ravage him like one of his stupid girls...oh hell, where did that come from?  
Dean visibly shivered, but only absently nodded and said nothing of what his best friend had just done to him.  
Castiel wasn't hurt this time. He wasn't embarrassed. He had no time to run away anymore. He moved himself from Dean's space and ducked around him, plopping himself down on the old couch.   
"O-okay" Dean whispered breathlessly, seemingly shaken.   
It took the man a few minutes to gather his bearings, and Cas himself was battling with his stupidity in his mind. It was like a silent war between the two of them and themselves. Castiel wanted to leave, but knew he had to stay, Dean wanted to stay, but knew he should probably leave. Cas did stay, but so did Dean. He made his choice. Sam wasn't here anyway, why couldn't he watch a movie with his friend, hm?  
"Titanic" the hunter said suddenly, turning around with a movie in hand. The angel snapped out of his thoughts and glances up at Dean, standing there with it dwarfed in his large hands, and slowly nods. Whatever it was, Dean had picked it, and Castiel would watch it.  
Sort of awkwardly, Dean shoots him a small smile, before walking over and popping the disc into the player by the TV. He pushes the button to power on the tv, and grabs the remote, before slowly making his way back to the couch.   
An unspoken question is exchanged between the two as Dean hovers beside the couch, glancing at the angel almost hopefully. Cas scoots over a fraction, and shoots a smile up at Dean, who gratefully plops down beside him. Really closely beside him...  
"So...what is it about Dean?" He inquires, looking up at Dean through his lashes. Dean chuckles then, finally breaking their awkward tension, his eyes still on the screen.  
"Just watch Cas" he says warmly, casting his friend a soft look, filled with a sort of affection that Castiel couldn't read. At least it was something. They both turn back to the screen as it starts, and are both instantly entranced.   
9:00  
Castiel couldn't help but think how odd this movie was. It was all about this young couple named Jack and Rose, who meet on this big ship and suddenly fall in love. He thought it was completely impulsive of them to do such a thing.   
"Dean, does-"   
"Shh" Dean shushed him. The poor angel had a small attention span. Dean didn't really know why he'd chosen a 3 hour movie in the first place, but all day he'd encountered things that just don't seem to go along naturally with his life, like, well, Cas. Why not a guilty pleasure movie to add to the whole messed up mix?  
"But Dean, what happens when-" the angel tried again. He had questions that he needed to be answered!  
"Dude." Dean warns, but Castiel can tell he was keeping himself from laughing. He didn't understand why he couldn't just ask his questions. It's not like he shouldn't talk during a movie or anything.  
"I just want to know if-" he tried, frustrated.  
"Cas" Dean laughed then, interrupting his question by covering the angel's mouth with one large hand, the other hand on his shoulder, holding him back against the couch. Cas was taken aback, his eyes wide and confused as to why Dean's hand was over his mouth. Not that he would move it...it smelled like Dean, and was warm and course like him too. It was almost nice to have his mouth and body trapped by the hunter's hands.  
"Man, you gotta give it time. No questions Cas, they'll be answered when you finish the movie. Okay?" The man said, a smile in his eyes. Cas nodded against his hand, and Dean slowly let him go.   
"All I wanted to know was if-"   
And then Dean was laughing. He was laughing and it was real, the realist thing Castiel had ever heard. It was a loud, bellowing, head-thrown-back laughter that was a gift to witness. He himself was awestruck by the happiness that Dean gave off, something that Cas had truly only seen maybe once or twice in the years he'd know the hunter.  
The movie went on without them as Dean laughed, the huge ship in the beginnings of sinking, but neither of them was paying attention. The angel couldn't keep his eyes off the wrinkles at the corners of Dean's eyes, or the way his mouth hung open wide with that smile and laughter coming out of it.  
And Castiel was happy. He was bubbly and giddy and completely in love with this laughter, and he never wanted it to stop. He wanted it to stretch forever, and it almost felt like it did. He wanted Dean to be forever this happy.  
But Dean, being Dean, got a hold on himself, wiping his eyes and clutching his stomach trying to regain his breath. All good things do come to and end, but that smile still remained. And it was real.  
"You're really somethin' " he said to Cas, suddenly slapping his knee that was closest to Dean. He jumped, but cast a smile to Dean. It was the first touch he had given to him, and with an hour left before the potion wore off, Cas was taking all he could get. Maybe he coul even squeeze something more out of him.   
"Somethin'" Cas repeated, the smile lingering on his face as they both turned back to the movie. He was the last to turn his attention back to the screen, eyes still enraptured with the beauty of his human, even with the blue light of the TV screen glowing on his face.  
~  
A long while passed between the two, eyes still glued to the screen. Castiel couldn't believe that the moving picture could still be going, but the plot was interesting enough, and Dean seemed to be enjoying himself, so he made himself stay through it.   
He was trying to be calm too, really he was. The time crunch loomed over his head, and he could hear every second pass by with every tick of the clock on the wall. He was anxious, and trying not to panic, but he put on his facade very well. Dean shouldn't know how uneasy he was.  
But he was getting angry...very angry. Why couldn't Dean just fess up? Why couldn't he give Castiel what he needed and craved? Why couldn't he just LOOK at him for once, and see how much Cas wanted him? What was takin him so long?! He was fed up and frustrated that Dean couldn't give him more than a knee slap. That he couldn't utter the words back to Castiel, who refused to think that Dean didn't actually love him. It couldn't be possible.   
But with all the anger and doubt in his mind, the main thought floating around, was that he was out of time.   
It was 10:20.


	7. Real

"You were right Dean" Castiel says suddenly, desperate for the potion to work.   
"Mm what about?" The hunter murmered back, relaxed. He kept looking at the damn screen. For his father's sake, when would this movie end?!  
"This movie IS romantic" he replies, looking down into his lap. His hands were worrying themselves, fingers and palms moving back and forth in all different directions and tangling themselves together. He was mildly panicked, and very frustrated.   
Dean finally looks at him them, those bright green eyes practically melting him where he sat.  
"That's what you wanted wasn't it?" He grins, nudging the angel with his shoulder. Cas nods, trying and failing to smile at Dean's attempt to buddy him. He didn't want to be a buddy, not a friend, nor an aide. He wanted to be HIS.  
So he overcame his awkward, shy self in a few quick seconds, and slowly placed a fingertip on Dean's overturned palm closest to him. The man stiffened, and immediately cast his gaze onto his hand. So Castiel moved.   
He traces random shapes and lines onto Dean's skin, feeling the roughness of it beneath his finger. Dean didn't move, nor did he speak. It was like he was frozen, getting lost in watching his angel drag a fingertip across his hand.  
And Cas was getting lost in it too, in his own way. The feeling of course skin against his own soft skin was a most heavenly feeling, and truthfully, he didn't want it to end. It calmed his panic, if only for now. He only had -he glanced up at the clock- 7 minutes left.  
"Don't humans normally embrace their hands during love movies Dean?" He asked quietly, keeping his attention on his hand working against Dean's.   
Castiel could hear the hitch in Dean's slow breathing, and watched his eyes widen ever so slightly.  
"This...this isn't what I'd call normal Cas" the man croaked in response.   
"I've never held hands with anyone" the angel muttered after a short pause.   
Dean knew what was coming next. Anyone remotely smart would know.   
"Can I hold yours Dean? To try it out?" Castiel finally uttered out. He stopped moving his finger across the palm of Dean's hand, and drew his eyes up to meet Dean's. But the hunter was frozen, his eyes on his best friend's.   
Why wasn't he saying anything? God dammit, say something! The angel was getting angry and restless. Dean's eyes trailed down to their hands, so close together. He was nervous, choking on his own breath. He couldn't speak. So he just nodded.   
Cas breathed a sigh of relief, and carefully intertwined their hands. Dean didn't squeeze his back like a normal person would, but just say there, his fingers limp in Cas's grip.   
5 minutes.  
He was taking all he could get, but he was frustrated for not getting more. And he was hurt. He'd spent an entire day trying to win Dean over, and nothing. Nothing more and a back pat, or knee slap, and now this one-side hand holding.   
He sighed. His thumb moved against the back of Dean's hand, and he stared into his lap in a defeated frustration.   
And then Dean squeezed back.   
Castiel shot up to look at him, but he was still staring at their hands.   
They were both lost in thought, both for different reasons. An the seconds ticked past.  
10:30  
Dejected, Castiel watched the clock turn from 10:29 to 10:30. He wanted to let go of Dean's hand, wanted to walk out of the room and run away in embarrassment. But he didn't. And what he did do was fueled by anger.  
"Dammit Dean" he suddenly growled, ripping their hands apart. Dean looked at him then, finally, out of surprise.  
"What? What did I do?" He quickly stammered, his cheeks blushing pink. The angel almost stopped his rant right then and there, seeing Dean's embarrassment.  
"All day, for 24 hours, I have sacrificed my cowardice and awkwardness and shyness for you! I made you coffee, I cooked you a meal, I even planned out this night! And you give me nothing? Can you really be that put off to me, to not want me like I want you, after all of these years of waiting for and after you?" He snarled, turning to face Dean on the couch, and shoving one of his shoulders farther into the rough cushions. It was like he was throwing up everything he's ever wanted to say, and it was all just coming out and he couldn't stop it.  
"Cas, what are you talking about?!" Dean asked, surprise written all over his face.   
"I went to a witch Dean! I put a love potion in your beer YESTERDAY at 10:30. You were supposed to reveal your feelings to me! But nothing changed Dean, nothing did." He shouted, his words getting quieter by the sentence, until the last one was only a sad whisper.   
Dean sat there, mouth open in shock. The seconds ticked by as Cas waited for words, anything the hunter could use to explain to him what he'd done wrong. But he wasn't prepared for what the hunter said.  
"I...I guess I've always loved you Cas. That's why nothing changed."   
The angel was about to go off on him again. But once the words sank in, he was stopped cold. He opened his mouth to speak, and shut it again.   
Dean was so nonchalant, a controlled chaos.   
"You-" he trailed off. He couldn't comprehend this. All this time...  
"Yes. I do." Dean replied. On the forgotten screen, the guy Jack was freezing by the second as he held Rose's hand in the freezing water.  
"You put a love potion in my beer, Cas?" Dean asked, almost chuckling at him. He was the one sitting there frozen now.   
"I thought it would make-"  
"That's one of the craziest things anyone has ever done for me" the hunter grinned.   
"No, no stop. Why now? Why after all this time, would you tell me this now Dean?" Cas came to his senses. He was still confused and frustrated.  
Minutes passed by, Dean working through his words, and Cas through his thoughts.  
"I don't know. I was afraid? The people who I've ever said that to have all left me in some way. I don't want that to happen with you. I can't have it happen with you. I need you." The hunter finally explained, his words almost a whisper.   
"I feel like I've waited eternity to hear that Dean" he said, and their eyes met. The sky against the forest, the ocean against the grass.  
"I'm sorry I took so long" Dean whispered back, pulling on Cas's hands and slowly dragging him closer until their faces were only a few inches apart. The angel could hear Dean's shallow breathing, his quickened heart rate.  
"Listen Cas, I've never-"  
Cas scooted closer, touching their noses together, their breath mingling sweetly.  
"Is this okay?" He asked in barely a whisper, and Dean nodded, taking a shaky breath. He was nervous. But Castiel wasn't. Dean had only just now realized that he'd wanted this, but Cas had known forever.   
"Can you kiss me now?" Dean whispered, and that was all it took for the angel. He hadn't ever had much practice with any of this, but with his human, it felt perfect and right when their lips touched.   
Dean's were soft and plump, Cas's chapped, and they moved together with incredible perfection. Nothing was better that this feeling of mouth on mouth, after waiting for so long.  
Dean released Cas's hands while their lips danced, and placed his own on Cas's face hesitantly. He was barely touching the angel's scruffed cheeks, but Castiel still lost his breath, stopping their kiss with a soft smile.  
Their foreheads resting together, eyes closed, both were smiling.   
"You can't leave me now Cas. You can't." Dean whispered, tilting Cas's chin up with his hand.  
He nodded, and they were kissing again, his hands finding Dean's flannel shirt and pulling him closer.  
This was all they had ever wanted, Castiel outwardly, and Dean secretly, and now it was happening.  
It was just them, and it was all real.

**Author's Note:**

> This one is a longer fic! I've been working really hard on it! Please enjoy and leave kudos/comments!


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